Followers of the Heart

October 18, 2011

Such is Life

Steve’s passing away has a spawned a generation of gleeful followers overnight. “Follow your heart” has assumed a cult status and is threatening to stop the Earth from turning. Every direction I crane my neck into, I see hordes of revellers doing what they had always wanted to but couldn’t.

Steve Jobs

The Follower of the Heart

Trust me, of late the eve-teasers have become shriller, pickpockets have upgraded themselves to burglars and burglars have promoted themselves into cold-blooded murderers. And to complete the honourable cycle, Judges are discovering more and more technical flaws to let stark criminals walk free. Government, a.k.a. the institutionalised corruption, is screwing the citizens harder and harder till they can’t even shit anymore and thus loose all respect for themselves for not being able to follow their asses!

Someone I faintly believed was an otherwise industrious blogger till the other day has taken to reckless eating and sleeping. She has even published a series on following her heart, solemnly vowing to ‘eat and sleep’ to be followed by more ‘eat and sleep’.

My scheming pair of twins has suddenly become naughtier. My mailbox is inundated with alarming warnings from Disney et al stating how my wards are calling their co-players ‘monkeys’ and ‘black’ on the internet. I believe they have stealthily started punching the enfant terrible of the neighbourhood when their doting parents are not around, too!

The wife has become more determined than ever. In one swift move, she has dropped all good looking damsels from her inner coterie of acquaintances. What has been more unfortunate though is the fact that the vacancies arising out of departure of beautiful women from her group have been answered with inclusion of toad-like beings. The other day she declared she always knew in her heart how selfish and useless certain lady was and she would not stand her in the name of society or harmony or whatever crap I may suggest. As you may guess, I had started taking some harmless interest in her!

One of these evenings I nearly fainted when I came upon the new cabinet enjoying an impromptu tea party. Some of them looked so horrid I swore noiselessly, ‘fair is foul and foul is fair….’ The doting woman that my wife is, it has been one of her seminal weapons to make herself more desirable by contrast. That said, she merely seems to have taken to her heart’s ways with an unbelievable passion.

And the less I say of my older folks, the better. They have suddenly decided to skip their morning walks and exercises. To hell with arthritis, breathlessness, blood pressure and indigestion! I suspect they have been skipping their daily medication too. My objections are being met by fatalistic witticisms on life, death, God and doing one’s own things!

As if Steve’s passing wasn’t a shock enough, the above state of affairs has set in a stubborn depression deep into my soul. That, coupled with the golden advice of the scorching genius, has guided me to spend on my credit cards as if the world were to oblige the Mayan calendar in a matter of but a few months. I have crystallised the huge ‘wishlist’ of books pending on various online portals notwithstanding the fact that I am already sitting on a growing pile of untouched books amassed over the years. I ordered that camera bag I always wished to sling along, added a new Speedlight to my photography kit and acquired the motorised version of a lens that I already had. My desktop computer now boasts of a beefy graphics card supported by a new state-of-the-art power supply unit. I have already paid a couple of visits to the Apple store and toyed with the iPhone and iPad and the cute salesgirl is sure I’ll return soon to pick them up. Now that I have developed the courage, everything else is secondary….

And what have these silly credit card companies been up to? A couple of them have called me saying I have shamelessly exceeded the limits sanctioned to me and that they are sorry to stop further transactions till I clear off the dues and applicable penalties. They are soon going to be able to connect the dots and realise I have simply been following my heart to the extent of no return and that, a Greek default is imminent!

, ,

About umashankar

I am just a watcher then. Sometimes I watch life. Sometimes I watch death. Many times I watch in between...

View all posts by umashankar

Subscribe

Subscribe to our RSS feed and social profiles to receive updates.

15 Comments on “Followers of the Heart”

  1. Giribala Says:

    Yayy…..wonderful!!! More courage to you so that we get to read awesome stuff 😀

  2. umlajoshi Says:

    I jumped at this post while surfing and well, I’ve got a totally new way of looking towards the ‘follow your heart’ meaning … you are right in very crisply putting the interpretations ! very nice read … quite a few takeaways from here … thanks !

    • umashankar Says:

      Welcome to my blog, Ashish. I am glad you enjoyed the light in which I interpreted the famed ‘follow your heart’ advice. Hope I am able to offer more takeaways in future!

  3. Mayank Says:

    *takes a bow* for this very interesting twist in the ‘follow your heart’ tale.

  4. PK Talli (@PatleeKamar) Says:

    I followed my heart and from earning couple of thousands quids I have been ridiculed to 5 a month 😐 Sigh, I followed before his demise and if I did not stop following my heart, you may have to write an obituary for me staying hungry and foolish.

    #_#
    The Blunt Blog

    • umashankar Says:

      Writing the obituary wouldn’t be a problem but that it will be read, and understood, could be one. I’d be grateful if you could just sign off as ‘Chintan’ though.

  5. zephyr Says:

    That was a great way to follow one’s heart. And I do sympathise with you for your wife’s cottoning on to your ‘harmless interest’ in one of her circle of friends. 🙂

    who is this blogger who has threatened to eat and sleep in a continuous cycle? I would love to see her blog! And you chastised me for having some innocuous cravings 😦

  6. ab Says:

    I can only repeat what I have often said before – a great post, laced with your usual dose of witticism and humour

  7. Lalit Says:

    Steve was a great marketing man, he knows how to play with people’s mind, just like Prasoon Joshi.

  8. chintan Says:

    I think I disgusted you with my latest post. Apologies, but it was quite harsh comment.

    Yes,I tend to suspect people a lot and that is because schizo and OCD that I have. May be you should not read such posts then.

    • umashankar Says:

      I am sorry for the flare up. But I am happy you returned. No hard feelings. God may not be in his heaven and all may not be right with the world, but the sky is not falling. Not yet!

      Take care.

  9. joshi daniel Says:

    lol. hope you will be back after some following 😉

%d bloggers like this: